Forum Topic

A message for contributors to this forum

Before you speak ask yourself if what you are going to say is true, is kind, is necessary, is helpful. If the answer is no, maybe what you are about to say should be left unsaid.

Jeffrey Cope ● 2056d33 Comments

Fair do's,in my opinion some of us try to do that already.As for'kind' and 'helpful',could you perhaps give an example of your context? For instance,this forum quite often has polar opposite opinions expressed.I think this is helpful if done in the correct(kind?) spirit as it helps to be able to see another point of view either to re-inforce one's own opinion or to further understand issues and maybe adapt one's view.I suppose I am asking 'Helpful to whom'?

Keith Iddon ● 2056d

mmm  not a lot sure about that Keith...Jeffrey – here's one of your most recent efforts – an immediate response to a thread by Bobbie Carnegie“BC is trying for the James Joyce award for minimal punctuation. Only two sentences in his contribution!” that was on Feb 21st..Any comment?

Stuart Kerr ● 2056d

We all have off days.

Janice Evans ● 2056d

Maybe I'll take off the rose tinted specs now..

Keith Iddon ● 2056d

Pot:kettle

Ken Munn ● 2056d

"what balderdash"Jefferey Cope 19/03/20 18:05:00Were the only 2 words in your reply to my post  " Complete Lockdown Needed"  Not only wrong and unnecessary but unhelpful and stupid.I think if you applied your own rule to yourself - you would have to find a new hobby.

Richard Potts ● 2056d

Your nice thread titled "Beware Michael Brown" dated 8 May last year is still on page 2 of the Hammersmith forum.Since it attracted absolutely zero response from the good people of that borough, perhaps you should have left what you said unsaid.

Roger Talbot ● 2056d

Julian Pavey ● 2056d

I've pm'd you Roger.

Ben Gemmingen ● 2056d

Jeffrey, you’ve been on the receiving end of a bit of gentle teasing today. It doesn’t mean you’re wrong that we could all be a bit more civil.  I try to remember to attach the idea, not the person. Sometimes I succeed!

Kerry Chandler ● 2056d

Nicely written Kerry..Twas far more of a well-intended yet naive senior moment after a blip in the short term memory system..x

Stuart Kerr ● 2056d

As is often the case Kerry, you are the welcome voice of reason.

Keith Iddon ● 2056d

Posts on this forum in which posters disagree or even resort to insults are thankfully very rare.

Simon Temple ● 2056d

Look, I’ve quoted peoples words back at them too. I’ve been mean sometimes. It’s the nature of this type of forum. Those of us who post regularly probably aren’t that bothered by it but I suspect we have a better debate when we’re more tolerant. Stuart, you made an interesting post yesterday but I haven’t responded to it because I’m not up for an ugly debate. Keith, I haven’t agreed with some of your recent posts but it makes me think why you feel so strongly, because for a long time I’ve agreed with everything you say. The reason we can’t just bounce around opinions is that it just turns so nasty and so tribal.

Kerry Chandler ● 2056d

Au contraire Simon ,I have to disagree,agreeably.Every other thread descends into personal attacks and bickering.I blame Trump.

Ben Gemmingen ● 2056d

Oh put a sock in it you stupid pillocks.

Simon Temple ● 2056d

:) :) :)

Claire Moran ● 2056d

Thank you Kerry,I am as humbled as I am pleasantly surprised by your remarks.I have been as guilty in the past as anyone but the name calling and insults are also in the past for me.

Keith Iddon ● 2056d

. ...- . .-. -.-- -... --- -.. -.-- / ..--..

Ben Gemmingen ● 2056d

Got it!

Simon Temple ● 2056d

Perhaps now Jeffery needs to apologise for very rudely calling it ‘complete balderdash’ that we needed a complete lockdown last year when suggested by another contributor!

Steve Taylor ● 2055d

Perhaps you would be so good as to spell my name properly.I believe the phrase "complete balderdash" was referring to a  contribution which projected to 148,000 deaths due to covid in something like a couple of months originally left by K Munn. I may be wrong, the memory fails me sometimes these days.

Jeffrey Cope ● 2055d

Well-come back Jeffrey..carry on....

Stuart Kerr ● 2055d

Has anyone ever succeeded in changing the ways of this forum? If you don't like it leave is the usual reply in these situations and I frequently do leave, but seem to come back when the mood takes me and when my armour is fully on.

Maggie Dodge ● 2055d

My understanding, Jefferey, was that you replied in two words, namely,  “what balderdash". These were the only 2 words in your reply to Mr Potts’  post  " Complete Lockdown Needed"  This seems to be a reasonably conclusive insult which is not mitigated because it may have been Mr Munn’s pop rejection of 148,000 deaths. History has now shown that, had we had a complete lockdown at that time, many more lives could have been saved. Whichever way you try to spin this you cannot alter the fact that your outburst of ‘balderdash’ was disrespectful and had proved to be very wrong. A total lockdown was needed at the time and is still needed today!

Steve Taylor ● 2055d

It’s an interesting question, Maggie. I’m going to guess no!If anything, I’ve tried to change a bit myself.  There’s no point arguing sometimes.  It’s true in life but I’ve seen it here.I don’t think peoples opinions are changed often either. Hardly at all. I’m definitely more likely to go the extra mile in terms of recycling, for example, because of posts from Philippa and Rima. There was an incredibly useful post from Sophia Powell about coping with breast cancer treatment that I used myself and have shared with people far and wide.I’ve discovered things locally, like Mailbox, because of posts here. Fun things too like the Soho House Festivals. I think it’s a really useful space and we’re lucky the Chiswick forum is so well subscribed.It would be great if we could all be a bit kinder but it might be a bit more dull. Also, if I never heard another opinion about cycling, I wouldn’t mind!

Kerry Chandler ● 2055d

Steve, seriously, just let it go. Saying someone is speaking balderdash isn’t that bad an insult, even if the person saying it is plain wrong.Calling someone a moron, on the other hand, is a horrible insult.  It would be, even if there were some truth in the point being made.

Kerry Chandler ● 2055d

Aah, now YOU are talking balderdash, Kerry!  Nice one. As soon as you have had your say you try to shut everyone else up. Guess what? Unfortunately for you, forums don’t work like that!

Steve Taylor ● 2055d

No!  As if I could shut you up.  I’m just saying no apology needed, maybe we should move on.

Kerry Chandler ● 2055d

What about 'white lies'?

Brian Coyle ● 2055d

Mmmmm. You are saying no apology is necessary, Kerry.  What gives you the right to dictate as such?  You are saying we must just move on! I would suggest that would be spineless! Jeffrey started this thread with good intentions, possibly only because he had a brain lapse and conveniently ‘forgot’ that he had last year, rather rudely, and curtly, accused someone of speaking balderdash  when they expressed an opinion on an extremely important subject  i.e. lockdown.  Hypocrite comes to mind. Do as I say not as I do. I would have thought that in the spirit of being kind, honest and courteous to all contributors, Jeffrey may wish to apologise so that he can ‘move on’ !

Steve Taylor ● 2055d

This Forum started some 20 years ago. The posts were generally friendly and informative.Things evolved to the extent that Forum Meet-ups were popular and keenly anticipated. Any future such occasion might require a few bouncers to be in attendance. Who do you fear meeting face to face?A shame really.

Jim Lawes ● 2055d

Good point Jim. Mind you, I'd rather walk in front of a bus than meet any of you lot.

Simon Temple ● 2054d